There is something about risking everything to follow Jesus that brings about a pit in your stomach so heavy that you couldn’t eat a thing because you feel like you just drank a gallon of warm sweet cream.
When I continue to think about the letter that will be published in 4 days in the paper of my alma mater I get a little queasy. Nothing will be the same. Of course this is an exaggeration because not all of the 14,000 students will read the paper and of those who do the number who know me or know of me is probably statistically small. But they are significant to me. It is comforting that the large majority of them are going to tell me how courageous I am. But there is a small minority who may scoff at the past hypocrisy of my actions. There is always a risk of great personal loss. A risk of defamation of my name. A risk of physical and emotional injury.
But loss and death are gain. For when we lose our lives we gain them. That is the hope that spurs me onward. This is the faith that I have or try to have. That by exposing my soul, relinquishing privacy as Jesus did on Calvary, I may truly conquer sin and evil in my life and by the grace of God maybe in somebody else’s life too.
Also if you’re looking to lose weight this is probably a good diet. I bet I drop a pound or two between now and Tuesday.
Jesus I trust in you.